Martyr
by d-iamondxiii
Summary: "If I'm still worth saving, I'll leave this life behind me. I will show you who I could have been." Modern!AU Elsanna - Elsa has struggled for survival and her ties have twisted into the violence of the streets. These streets lead down a dark path with no way out, ending only in monstrosity. Atonement is futile. When Anna stumbles in, will Elsa realize that choices still exist?
1. Prologue

Modern!AU - Crime!AU - Elsanna, not sisters.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Frozen characters, all rights go to their respectful owners.

Welcome to "Martyr", an AU Elsanna story of crime, poverty, sacrifice, and faith. Warnings in advance, I enjoy angst. A lot. So there will be plenty of it. Mild gang violence. Abuse. Abandonment.

Romance in between. 3 Enjoy!

* * *

_If I'm still worth saving, I'll leave this life behind me. I will show you who I could have been._

Red and blue lights radiated in a dark cold night with the sounds of sirens piercing the quiet air. Orders were being shouted from left to right and muffled voices were heard from static. Paramedics were running frantic, lifting stretchers into ambulances and rambling out codes and conditions.

Blood was seeping onto the alleyway slipping into the cracks. One girl was backed against the wall, wide-eyed with tears. Her clothing was tattered and disheveled. A broad shouldered man was holding her tight with his hazel eyes showing fear and apprehension towards the one responsible for causing the girl's distress. A body was covered by a piece of cloth with red staining through as it slid into a body bag.

A murder had occurred that night.

Silver cuffs were clasped around the wrist of another girl. Her hands were creased in blood and frost. That was all the proof they PD needed. She didn't struggle or resist while being escorted away.

She caught eyes with the girl against the wall and tried to smile. The smile came out as a grimace under the weight of her grief. The girl's eyes that held so much regret was not something she was used to. She missed those blue eyes that held so much child like wonder and zest for life. She ached knowing that she could never see that again. She destroyed that chance within her grasp.

The cuffed girl paid no heed to the holes being burned into her face by the man protecting the fearful girl who looked like a small child within his arms. His judgments did not matter to her, no one else's ever did. Except her. Reaching out was useless so she settled for a solemn question.

"Was it worth it?" she whispered, her voice cutting through the winter night.

The girl gave no reply but her tears were all the answers that she needed.

Elsa had murdered a man that night. Her fate was sealed. Her innocence was forgotten long ago. Along the way hope had reared it's head in the dark. But the hope that sparked was dimming as minutes past. The hope that she could be free. The hope that she could be loved.

The hope that somehow Anna could ever love her in return.


	2. Beware the Frozen Heart

Chapter 2: Beware the Frozen Heart

Warnings for this chapter: Hints at drug use, violence, and very dark themed emotions.

This story is a slow burn, but stick with it, I'll make it interesting (; Enjoy!

*I currently don't have a beta reader so I'm bound to mistake, if anyone would be interested in helping, please PM3*

* * *

Metal cuffs scraped against Elsa's wrists as she was escorted down a cold stoned hallway. The hall was lined with iron bars. Within them, caged some of the world's greatest nightmares: killers, rapists, demons, and devils. They stared at the new addition to their territory like hungry beasts. Her appearance didn't match any of the others here. They were covered in scars, tattoos, and wore smug expressions. However, she looked untainted.

Her beauty was flawless beyond compare. Smooth pale skin, shining platinum blonde hair, and deep blue eyes. They say the eyes show all and within hers was a deep sea untouched but longing to be explored. Concealed within its depths, the waves of her past had engulfed all from tragedy to insanity. From hope to emptiness.

This storm raged within her but never beyond herself. That she made sure of.

_Conceal, don't feel. Don't let it show. _

_Don't show any weakness. Don't let them know._

_Because once you do, they will turn._

_They will turn their back and leave you to burn._

Elsa was shoved inside a cell with the iron bars shutting behind her with a clank. She gazed over her surroundings. A stained bed which had a cotton sheet draped over at an attempt to conceal the mess. A sink where the faucet let a lonesome drop fall every few seconds. A sliver of light shining through the window pane where the outside was an expanse of barren grass, brown in its suffering beneath the heat of the unforgiving sun. An unwelcome fear crept into her soul, encased within brick walls.

She wanted to escape as she always has. She wanted to be saved from this hell she never belonged to. Nothing but a child, forced and thrown into this way of living. But hoping was useless. She was alone since the clock struck her day of birth. Thirteen years of safety had been yanked from her grasp.

If this was all inevitable, she wished she had been abandoned long ago. To never have the chance at life. To never know what suffering truly meant.

Anna changed that, if not only for a moment. That maybe life wasn't just the suffering, the pure survival, and the drastic measures. She hoped and prayed that it could be true. That Anna was different and she could lead her to being something more than a monster.

But it was pointless to pray for such a miracle. She sat herself on the bed and put her head in her hands. It was time to face the truth, the truth that she belonged here. She wasn't worth saving. Regardless if what she did was to survive and get by, that made it no less of a sin. The moment they sealed the handcuffs on her wrists she had accepted her fate. There was no way out. And she wouldn't fight against the state to save her own worthless life.

She wasn't suicidal.

She just didn't want to live this life anymore. It all felt so empty.

She shut out every want, hope, prayer, and desire to leave. But in her dreams she would always be graced with the glimpse of her crawling to leave everything behind.

* * *

_Eight years ago._

_"Mama, papa, I-I don't understand. W-What do you mean I c-can't stay here?" Elsa asked, struggling to keep her voice even. _

_"We mean that you can't stay. Are you stupid, child? Or did you waste our money in all the school we've put you through?" her mother seethed, stone cold._

_Elsa flinched back a step. _

_"B-But where am I going to go? Why do I have to?" she cried. "...Don't you and Papa love me?"_

_Her father stepped forward, shielding over her mother and towering over her small form. She was frightened, his height normally a sense of security to her growing up, had become a threat. He looked down on her, his face tinted red and his eyes slightly hazy. His voice however was crystal clear._

_"Leave now. We can't afford to support such a burden." he ordered, grabbing her by the wrist in an iron grip. Her arm in one hand and her bag in another he dragged her to the door, Elsa kicking and screaming._

_"Papa please, no! I don't want to be alone. Please! I'm scared." Elsa sobbed, becoming more hysterical as the front door came close. "Papa, no! NO! Don't do this! I need you and mama to be with me. I don't want to be alone, I don't want to be alone!__" _

_With a forceful shove, she was thrown out onto the porch, the door slamming as her fists collided with it. She pounded with all her might but the door did not budge under her desperation. _

_"God please, no..." her cries became weaker as the pounds on the door became slower._

_She felt dizzy. She has felt this way for a while now, the feeling becoming stronger over the years. The pungent smell of alcohol and other aromas that didn't make sense to her increased in her home. She hallucinated that her father struck her mother in the shadows of the night. But that was just a figment of her imagination. _

_But right now, as the clear air breathed into her lungs, her mind began to clear as well. This was real. She wasn't hallucinating. She was alone._

_And in the end, her father never answered her question._

* * *

Her family had abandoned her and threw her between the loveless walls of the city. She didn't know what to think of parents abandoning the very thing they created. She willed her tears to no longer shed over something she didn't quite understand. Over something that didn't hit her completely. Instead she bottled all the negatives away and wandered into the unknown. Days passed until she could not comprehend the numbers. She had managed off of leftovers from behind restaurants, in dumpsters, and sometimes even stole. It was unjust, she knew it was. But choices were a privilege of which she did not enjoy; death wasn't even an option.

She found no comfort in death; in a place where its promises of salvation and peace were questionable. It didn't really matter to her if what they said was true. She was an angel with wings broken and marred by sin, regardless. Hell on earth, hell in death, what difference did it make?

But she only hoped that there was something or someone different in this hell. And maybe just maybe, she would be saved.

But thousands of people passed her day by day and with their passing took her hope. No one bothered to give a caring glance toward her, covered in the last bits of her belongings, tattered to rags and dirt.

But even she felt lower than that, worthless and alone. These feelings clouded her eyes which were once filled with life. But now it was sucked away. And the public showed no remorse. They just continued on with their lives that were important to them. And that is when she decided the world wasn't hell. It didn't burn her with their lashing flames and endless torture. The world was just a cold desolate place that froze her heart over. It robbed her of every warm emotion. They threw it all away and took everything for granted.

She continued to wander tiredly in the shadows. Fatigue had finally caught up with her as it dragged her to her knees and onto the crude asphalt. She had no more strength to lift a finger. As she lied there, she started to feel scared. She was alone. Nothing but tiny snowflakes to be her witness as they fell gently from the sky. Her raw fingers clutched at the snow, the cold making her bruises and cuts go numb.

"How could this have ever happened?" she whispered.

She was supposed to have a family. She was supposed to live her dreams one day and show the world. She was supposed to have friends that she could depend on.

She was supposed to be happy.

Perhaps those things were never meant to be hers. If a god really existed, he must have chosen her a sacrifice for the gain of happiness by others.

With all the strength seeping away she allowed herself to cry. Angry tears flooded over her skin and wracked her body with uncontrollable trembling. Lying there helpless, she allowed her eyes to close, falling into a deep sleep. She did not care if anything came after her now. She secretly wished her eyes wouldn't see light again.

* * *

Man, I'm evil. My poor baby Elsa.

To clarify if you didn't get my wording, Elsa's parents were abusive and drug addicts. They threw her out knowing they couldn't afford supporting a child if they wanted to gain more. It would be one less person to pay for and thus more money for themselves to feed into their addiction. Twisted? Yes. Necessary for character development? Absolutely.

TBC.


End file.
